A handful of words to describe this weekend: bizarre, exhausting and exhaustive, inspiring, terrifying, soul-crushing, intense, horrible, wonderful.
The ACT callback weekend was incredibly well organized, which is something I could absolutely appreciate. They arranged your hotel, helped you get your flights (and then reimbursed you) and gave you a schedule of events which they followed basically to a T. I touched down in San Francisco for my first time at around noon and rushed into the city (and on the way rode the train with a very strange guy who was clearly looking for a casual San Fran weekend hook up -- yeesh).
I arrived late for the orientation, although everyone was incredibly chill and welcoming. There were about, 15 of us in total. I was about two hours into my weekend there, and I was already exhausted. Uh-oh. After a brief chat with Melissa, we were given about an hour, so I ran over to the hotel (only a ten minute walk from the school), checked in and washed my face. Despite the fact that we no longer live in an era of stagecoaches and days of travel, I think we may have too quickly retired the idea of a "traveling clothes." Whenever I take a plane, or even the El, I still feel like I manage to get coated in a thick dusting of grime.
Then, it was back to ACT for a final rehearsal of the first year's "Will on Wheels" show, which was an abbreviated version of Romeo and Juliet. Then, a small break before a reception with ACT staff and students (color me terrified). Luckily, there was beer and wine and snacks there, and everyone made a conscious effort to mingle and to make small talk. My fears of standing in a corner crying over a plate of cheese squares and crackers were not, thankfully, realized. Astoundingly, I had already started to make a small group of friends, with which I went to dinner after the reception. Then, it was straight off to Napoli!, the ACT mainstage production. I'm not going to get into a long review of it here, mostly because that whole weekend feels like a vague, blurry second of my life. Let's just say this -- the set, costumes & lighting were brilliant. All of the acting was really strong. The play itself...eh. Not sure if it was a product of the translation, or if the play in its original Italian was also a bit meh. (Ah, what a thoughtful, intelligent review. "Meh," raves The New York Times. "The play itself...eh," proclaims Peter Travers of the Rolling Stones.)
Afterwards, there was an optional cocktail reception with the students, which I went to for all of four seconds before I realized I was being far too ambitious and promptly returned to the hotel to go to sleep. Which I then did. Quite soundly. But only for about eight hours (which sounds like a lot, but it so, so wasn't) before we were up again to take a walk through the rainy streets to ACT's costume shop, a Tardis-like building: unassuming from the outside, inside a maze of rooms that went back and back and back. I got to touch the costumes used in their production of Taming of the Shrew back in the 70s, which I had watched many a times on Youtube. That was pretty great.
Then, we returned to the main ACT building for a vocal warm-up with Jeffrey Crockett, thus kind of beginning the official audition portion. I have to admit, for some reason, it was really hard for me to connect with the lesson or to relax. I think it was just the extra pressure I was putting on myself, and the fact that I wasn't quite sure when we were or weren't being assessed (a distinction that quickly became apparent to me later in the day, so I can safely say they are NOT really assessing the vocal warm-up. That is there for you and your benefit).
Next were the individual monologue presentations, which were actually the least stressful part of the day for me. That is something you have prepared for, you know what to expect and you're ready (or at least you should be). It was a lot of waiting around, and I of course was last. You just go in, do your two monologues and song, and walk out. I felt pretty connected to my pieces and positive about my performance.
Next, we had a meeting with Cary Perloff, the artistic director of ACT. It was really lovely to hear her speak about theater. She's incredibly passionate and eloquent (as you'd have to be as an artistic director). Then, a quick financial aid meeting. Then FINALLY THANK GOD LUNCH TIME. Some of the first and second year students joined us to eat and answer some of our questions, but honestly my brain needed down time, and my stomach need food ASAP, so I was more focused on that than I was on having a serious conversation with the students.
Next, we had a workshop with the head of physical theatre, Stephen Buescher. This is when I realized that we were definitely being assessed. A whole slew of the staff were in the room with us, lined up against one wall, with all the stacks of our resumes. During this whole workshop, and the next one, they were looking through the resumes and scribbling notes on it. It was terrifying despite my attempts to ignore it. The workshop started with just some general movement work in the group, which was fun. Stephen Buescher clearly knows his shit. However, it then transitioned into this improvisational work, and I felt incredibly subpar about my performance. I'm not very good at improv, unless I'm in a space with people I know and trust with a teacher who has worked with me and knows me. It's a slow process for me, so just being thrown into that situation was not good. But, there was nothing I could have done in advance to prepare, so... I tried to shake off my immense disappointment as we transitioned into a workshop with the co-head of voice and dialects, Lisa Ann Porter, which was a much more positive experience for me. I didn't necessarily feel like I stood out in any way, but I think I did a solid job. Then...just a few more Q&As with staff members we hadn't met yet, and then it was over.
I headed to a bar with some of the people from my group who were sticking around that night, and we drank and relaxed and watched the Oscars before heading back to the hotel and continuing the party there. It was really great to blow off steam after such an intense and stressful day. I woke up the next morning hungover, incredibly congested and with a terrible sore throat. I'm just glad my body held out until the end. I felt...empty. And sick. And a bit disappointed. But also incredibly lucky that I had gotten the opportunity to go to San Fran, meet incredible artists and be reminded why I love theatre. I left for the airport and returned home, where I found out that people had already started receiving offers. I heard back at the end of the next day, when I got an email saying I had been chosen as a reserve, and that I'd find out towards the end of the month if they would have a place for me. I still haven't heard anything back, so I'm assuming no one has dropped out.
So, a largely positive experience. It really is a great opportunity, and they treat you so well while you're there. They really made me fall in love with the school, so that did make the rejection a bit harder (rather than when you audition for a school you've never visited and they say no). And I was disappointed in myself for my performance in the physical theatre workshop (or, rather, lack of performance). But, in those situations, you just have to focus on the positive because so much is out of your control.
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